Friday, January 29, 2010

Docs (and Happy Friday!)


Photo courtesy of Famous Footwear
Kind of a tough week...weaned off caffeine again, so i'm tired more...scrambling for work at work, trying to stay ahead...waiting for answers to health questions that won't be broached for another 2 weeks still...running out of dough...so, the usual.

But my wonderful mommie got me these babies last weekend, and they came in the mail yesterday. I'm paying her back in installments, god bless her. I've been wearing my New Balance to work for ages, or a pair of the ugliest oxfords I've ever owned...the kind of shoes where you buy them and then spend the next X months/years berating yourself and wondering what the hell you were thinking when you threw money down on them, because they're so ugly...of course, there are those who think the same about Docs probably...

I bought my first Docs in college and I'd still be throwing a little polish on 'em and wearing them if I hadn't literally grown out of the damn things...they were a little small to begin with, so when my feet finally caved to the weight on my bod and grew a bit, the old Docs were no longer feasible. I've been lost in the shoe department for the last year, bouncing between the ugly oxfords, a pair of mocs that offered less than zero support even with my orthotics, or dress or athletic sneaks. Then the dress sneaks wore out. And the money's never there for clothes or shoes.

I'm so jazzed to have a new pair of Docs! I call 'em my butt kicking shoes. Or a desperate attempt to cling to my youth. I mean, it's not like I go clubbing anymore. But they're comfy and look cool, and last for-frickin'-ever, so I'm so grateful to Mom for helping me with the investment.
As for the weekend, Les is finally feeling better, getting energy back after the flu, so we're cleaning house!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Not a lot to report...

but feeling the need to ramble...

Work still slow...

Having a fresh flexible spending account for medical stuff means I'm getting some testing and issues taken care of...more on that later...dentist tonight, bleh!

Crock potted a roast last night, pretty closely based on smitten kitchen's southwestern brisket recipe...I'll let ya know how it turned out.

Haven't been knitting...it's been weeks actually...not sure what the problem is there.

Time still marching rather quickly...can't believe we're almost done with January. Weather's turned pleasant here.

It's so funny how my memory fetches up stuff...realized last night that I've been missing 2 blogs from my side list, and this morning, another one popped into my head while I was trolling. Welcome back to Two Frog Home, Throwback at Trapper Creek, and the Tiny Farm blog!

Friday, January 22, 2010

my god, the boredom!

I'm grateful to be employed, I'm grateful to be employed...

Sales have been dead since the holidays. Holy crap, it's boring! We scrabble for sites like crabs on a feeding frenzy, and it's extra frustrating when you do grab a site, only to have to send it back to copywriting/design because it's unfinished.

It's helping motivate me to punch up the ole resume and really look at the different fields I want to try for up nawth. I'm not just looking at web design/editing...yes, it's where the bulk of my experience lies, but if I can't find work in that field, I'm also looking at technical writing, print editing/writing, medical clerical, bagging groceries, Starbucks barista...OK, the last ones may be a stretch to pay the bills, but you get the idea...leaving the ole options open. Although...

Finally over the whiny, snotty cold...Husby got a variant of it naturally, so he's useless right now. That sounds mean; I just mean I can't nag him to do the dishes or clean up around his table when he's feeling extra-miserable. I want to SCRUB the house this weekend; it needs it so badly. Also continuing to consolidate...made good progress in my head last weekend, but it has that whole "tiny tip of the iceberg" feeling.

Love that the meal plan concept kind of worked this week. Keys to its continued success include weekly planning and not making too much food. We have limited freezer storage and I don't can yet. The tuna casserole I made this week was too big for the 2 of us, and unfortunately will result in wasted food. Live and learn.

Got a really nice surprise...for some unidentifiable reason, my electric company applied our deposit toward our bill, so we're in the black with them until next month. We may live paycheck to paycheck, but for some reason, life hands us lemonade when we need it.

Weather's back to normal down here. Hard to get pissy about it when the sun's out and it's pushing 70. I'm finally thinking about growing things again...found the seeds I got from last year's Green Expo, and hope to spend some time this weekend planning what I can grow between now and September. Another full-of-promise weekend :)

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Recently crossed off "to-do" list...

1. Created fresh floor space in bedroom.
2. Unearthed kitchen from weeks' worth of dirty dishes.
3. Unearthed dining area, reorganized a box or three.
4. Planned or created meals that will last as leftovers for the rest of the week (tuna casserole last night, shepherd's pie tonight...we won't discuss the disaster that was the white chicken chili...::sigh::).

The Goodwill/Hubbard House box still sits in the living room, accumulating excrement. I'm going to hang the bedroom curtain this week if it kills me. Clearing some dust collectors off the top spaces in the bedroom, disappearing some things, tossing some others...

Got an offer from one of the collection agencies that would help the ole credit score if I took them up on it...gotta find a way to make that work. August coming too quickly!

Feels so good to be feeling better after the whiny, miserable head cold...will feel even better once I'm past the medical tests I'm getting done tomorrow.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Haiti


I know I really only have a little handful of readers, but prayer isn't enough.

Here's a list of fellow bloggers who have information/links on how/where to donate to assist in Haiti's recovery:

Yarn Harlot
Pioneer Woman (incredibly generous giveaways/donations)
Soule Mama
Wendy Knits

And kudos to this blogger, who posted about the above links too, and sent her prayers, healing energy out to the blogosphere:

beauty that moves

Such a simple thing, spreading the word.


Edit and icon: beauty that moves went one better...a wonderful group was started at Etsy: Craft Hope for Haiti. She donated 20 of her prints to the group, with 100% of the proceeds benefiting Doctors without Borders. There's a pile of neat stuff from other crafters as well. Go check 'em out!

Random grumblings and snotty nonsense

Geez, colds suck. I guess I haven't had one in ages, because yesterday was just the most miserable day I've had in I don't know how long...

They make Puffs tissues with the Vicks vapor stuff built in. I find this both helpful and hilarious.

I call them Dad colds. Dad and I both used to get colds that were attached to one eye. You get tingles in your nose and then both that nostril and the corresponding eye run. It's a blast. Weird thing is, with Dad, it was the right eye; with me, it's the left. That's also my lazy eyelid, so I end up looking like I'm on drugs or something. Which I kind of am. Been trying several remedies since the shocker that Drixoral is no longer on the market in the States (yeah, that'll stop the home manufacturing of crystal meth, good call, jackasses)...the Sudafed non-drowsy 12-hour was good for keeping me awake and relieving the sinus headache, but disappointing in the nose department. Today I'm trying Publix's brand of Claritin, but I think the Zicam chewables and sleep are doing the most good. Crashed for 2 hours when I got home yesterday, and slept a lot better last night. Patience...thank goodness the week is coming in for a landing.

Haiti...I wish I could donate. I wish I could fly down there and help. Bandage a wounded person, hold someone in my arms while they cry. I've felt a special something for Haiti ever since Oprah "discovered" Edwidge Danticat 15ish years ago and spotlighted Breath, Eyes, Memory in her book club. Danticat writes haunting novels; she's a tremendous talent.

That said, anyone of the Christian persuasion who comes out and says that Haiti's getting what they deserve is a flaming asshole. There oughta be a special voodoo doll out there with Pat Robertson's name on it this morning. Close-minded, self-righteous moron.

Had my aversion to the death penalty tested for about 5 minutes yesterday. My mom came really close to being a juror in a high-profile trial here in town this week. Back in 2006, an 8-year-old girl was murdered in a drive-by shooting. The story goes that she died because she shielded her young cousins with her body when she heard the bullets start flying. Three brothers are standing trial for her murder with at least 2 up for potential death penalty sentencing, because this is Florida after all, and we're trying to catch up with Texas. But it's one of those stories that makes you wince, and wish you could beat the suspects to a bloody pulp yourself...or it tests your humanity by making you wish that they at least get life in prison so that they have years of being butt-raped to look forward to. That can't be a thought much more humane than pro-death penalty. But then I gave it a real think, a step-back think, and my pacifism is intact. Killing bad people doesn't stop the killing, any more than incarcerating them for the rest of their lives does. But the peace I believe in and search for won't happen in my lifetime, or my children's children's lifetimes likely, so we do the best we can for now. If that keeps me off juries in the future because I can't shove a needle into somebody, so be it.

Heh, did I call Pat Robertson self-righteous earlier? Better take a glance in the mirror after this post /:)

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

::sigh::

nothin' like realizing AFTER you've pulled your shirts all the way up for the EKG, that you really should've shaved your pits that morning...

may be a low post week...I hab a code :(

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Wrap up of first week










Yeah, kind of snoresville. But I'm learning to not always use the flash and my hand's steadier.

Neat stuff from these pics...
1) That's not the moon in the top pic, it's a light reflection.
2) I keep the CPU on top of my desk because I don't have a cord long enough on my earbuds, and I sometimes need the earbuds to check vid and audio on sites.
3) Yes, that's a Starbucks Christmas ornament at the far left in front of the penguin :)
4) Yes, that fourth pic is a closeup of one of my cube wall shots...from an old Greenpeace calendar, I think it's a shot of the Cumberland Valley mountains.

Now I have to get off this blasted computer and go unearth the dining room...again...bleh!

Friday, January 08, 2010

Blog Lovin'

I love blogs. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE them, it turns out. Some people (heh, Husby in partic) wonder how I can spend so much time on a computer, but it's the easiest thing in the world when you come across a blog you like. You read down a little, troll the archives, and then check out the blogs that appeal to that person and wham-o, you're at another blog that strikes your fancy and sets things stirring in your head and heart. Something that speaks to another part of your creative muse or your soul or something, and gets you dreaming about projects and food and other wonders of life...Waldorf wonderfulness and canning and living authentically and sustainably and...

So I've been trolling today, searching for blogs I may have missed when I rebuilt the list at right, and coming across even more that I look forward to reading at my leisure, mucking up my work numbers and filling my head with delightful dreams...

Welcome to:
exhale. return to center.
Small Measure
Design*Sponge
Food in Jars
Confessions of a Locavore
Smitten Kitchen
Honey & Jam
Chiot's Run

They're listed on the right; go check 'em out. CANNOT WAIT to get home and play some more... :)
Have a great weekend, y'all! More pics coming...

Change

For no reason other than my scatty brain needing a change, I switched my URL to http://embermadrone.blogspot.com/. I'm over lighthouses and hoping to expand on the ole blog this year in content, images, etc., so figured my pagan name was more encompassing...or something...

Happy Friday, y'all! Got to work 2 hours ago, and have yet to edit a site...gotta love the holidays for destroying productivity.

Edit: ACK! Changing URL deleted all my blog faves, but left the regular site faves. Had to add them back from memory...pretty sure I missed one or three. Ah well...

Thursday, January 07, 2010

One Small Change

I talk a good game, but my follow-through usually needs work. I want so badly to live differently, to do better at living simply, helping the environment, making the world better, but at the end of the day, I let life wear me down and do nothing. Accountability helps a lot in this area, I find, and the new year with all its glorious promise beckons me to make small changes.

I've made some small strides. I use reusable grocery bags all the time now...if I forget to put them in the car, I buy new. All our house lights are running on CFLs, which I love...it's a softer light and of course, so much longer lasting. Unfortunately, the recycling fell away sometime last year, as did planting my own food, and there are other areas of our life that could use some work too.

One Small Change by Hip Mountain Mama looks like a nice way to make myself accountable.

January is going to be about purging, paring down the massive detritus that has accumulated in our apartment over the last 11 years. Clothes and other products will go to Goodwill, Salvation Army, or the local thrift stores. We have both Goodwill and Salvation Army thrift stores close by. I will throw away as little as possible in this area, instead making the effort to thrift or freecycle things. The space that results from this purge will allow me to reintroduce recycling into the apartment in February—one of our problems with it last time, was just not having spare room for a bin. Literally, our place is filled with crap...every spare corner or wall is taken up with boxes, furniture, etc. Having the recycling bin in the foyer was inconvenient and messy.

This purge will tie in with the other new tag on this blog, Accomplish Your Dreams. Thanks to One Green Generation for this piece of motivation. I've talked for years about moving out of Florida, but my inability to organize or save well enough, coupled with our credit issues, has kept us in this crazy sauna of a state (this week notwithstanding...man, I'm loving the cold weather!). So I'm making myself accountable for the move here too. So far, it's working...I'm using my planners and reacquainting myself with the concept of to-do lists (which fell off long ago in spite of my Virgo status). I'm thinking hard about the types of jobs I'm going to try for in the Carolinas. I'm also taking steps to attend to my health, which will help us on the road to another dream: parenthood.

Tall orders, but I look ahead with confidence and feel strong.

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

6 January


Today I remember my grandma, whose birthday was today. She left us for Summerland back in 1988. Ironically, today's picture showcases a landscape print in the background by my other grandma, Nanie :)

Still wired from dentist visit earlier...


Dentist chair

Pre-chair:
1. I hope my breath doesn't smell like coffee.
2. Crap, did i get the googles out of my eyes this morning?!...whew, looks good.
3. Please don't let there be anything hanging out of my nose.
4. This music keeps transporting me back to prom.

In chair:
OK, she knows about the cracks in the teeth on that side, she'll be careful, I told her about my aversion to the iron hook, well the waterpic thing she's using isn't bad, WHOA except there, well this doesn't seem too bad except the music ain't getting any better, and yup, sure enough, they're actually playing the theme song from the ole prom now, geez i'm old, well maybe this won't be too bad if she just uses this thing, lord, people could write entire books about dentist chair anxiety, and I bet shrinks could study the mental process of how easy it is to neglect visits and cause yourself more pain, like how women don't remember all the pain of being pregnant, yeah that's probably a load too, but at least she's finishing up...oh hell, she IS going to use the iron hook, great, time to visualize and remove yourself mentally from the chair to distract yourself from how nails-on-a-blackboard the iron hook on your teeth makes you feel, i bet zen buddhists don't have trouble in the chair, see, can't wrap your mind around that scenario either, i could think of it as character building or something, having to go through this, but is there a way to separate character from ego to make it a zen experience, since zen is all about removing ego from the equation, sonofabitch that hook is sending my spine 'round the bend, and now she's commenting on how I need to get cleanings every 6 months to ensure the cleanings aren't this uncomfortable, yeah, no shit, sherlock, but after Dad died, it's like everything went on hold for a solid year and then took another year to thaw out, and now here we are with 2 potential crowns and how many cavities to deal with, crap, we could kill 2/3rds of my flexible spending account on my teeth alone, never mind that Husby has a mouthful of stubs rotting out of his mouth, dammit, I need a better job...finally, she's done, bringing the chair back up and wow, been holding a bit of tension in my whole body, huh, can feel it in arms, legs, neck, dang, I need to shake out and I've had to pee for a half hour...

Post-chair:
1. Where the hell's the money going to come from, I'm going to have to ignore the fillings...
2. Mental shopping list: new toothpaste, ACT
3. Man, I'm wired, wish I could run around the building a couple of times to burn this off...
4. Where the hell's the nearest Starbucks?

Monday, January 04, 2010

4 January - Back at work








Ah, the joys of ownership...had a nice shot of my work desk, but realized it showed proprietary info too clearly on my computer. So you have to settle for a neat angle, some granola, and the moon setting. Apparently there's a black swan somewhere around our complex...hope I can get a shot!

Sunday, January 03, 2010

2 January




Where my head's at, in that order. :)

Saturday, January 02, 2010

1 January a day late...(with the usual verbal diarrhea)




I want to try my hand at photo essaying this month. I think it'll help motivate me in the cleaning department, steady my hand with the ole point and click, and give me different perspectives on things. Going to try just photos sometimes if I can...don't know how the writer in me will keep from commenting though. Example: top pic is, of course, the Figmeister, doing what cats do. Lower pic illustrates my current state nicely: the new Vera Bradley from Mom (must snatch up more Caffe Latte prints before they're retired! It's a sickness!); the amazing wicker case from LilSisinlaw, which I'm thinking of using as a lunchbox at work; and the portfolio behind them, which will be used this year to plan the move.

It's probably good my brain was taken up with the task of tending to a 22-month-old yesterday...kept me from getting too contemplative. Sweet kid, didn't give me a lick of trouble, and I was paid handsomely for my efforts. Thank goodness. Amazing and humbling the relief that comes with a little dough...

But resolutions aren't a bad thing...they force you to take a look at yourself and your life, beat some dust out of your mental rugs, and move forward with new determination. I see some folks calling them what they are: goals. Think I'll take a stab at that too...that way they won't be broken nearly as easily.

Life is one big work in progress. Yeah, ok, not exactly profound. But we've been existing in this rut for so long, it's comfortable, and that's just not acceptable. I look around our dusty, smoky, cluttered apartment and I know it's not healthy, and that we can be happier, with hard work and goal setting. So what better time?

Never had a year go by as quickly as 2009 did. It's unsettling. Pretty sure it helped with the grieving process, the getting-by-without-Dad, but otherwise, it kind of blows. I'm a year older, still sans children, and we're in an apartment that oughta be condemned or fireblasted or something...

And this was going to be a low-word-count post ::chuckles::

As for the goals:

1. Catch up financially. Start saving.
2. Travel to NC in February, April, June, July, and August. Move top of September.
3. Find new job(s). Motivate husband to do same.
4. Continue eating healthy and exercising. Start walking and yoga on regular basis.

Hey, whaddaya know, I did keep it short. Left "get pregnant" off the list, because it's not something that falls under the category of "I have significant control over this and can make it happen." I'm learning patience, I'm eating better (sort of), dropping some weight, we can time things perfectly, and nature still may not bless us. So I'm stepping back a pinch mentally, or trying to.
And of course, I have the little goals...I want to continue knitting socks, finish the pullover sweater and start a cardigan, knit a pullover for Husby, and get craftier big time. I want to stop telling myself I can't draw and start just doing it. I want to sew more.

Those are big goddamn goals. Thing is, in this economic climate, where credit reports are taking a backseat to being able to pay your bills, the move is actually doable. We have lousy credit, but no evictions, more than 10 years in the same home, and as long as we can find work that'll pay the rent, I'm confident we can find a landlord/management company willing to work with us. Probably a bit wide-eyed, but catching up is going to be hard enough...time to get planning.