Pensive

Saturday was delicious, lots of fresh air, neat stuff...treated myself to some earrings, spent the whole day with Mom, really nice :)

Last night we heard a family friend had passed away. I've been in my head ever since. It's too close to Dad's 2 year...My Lil Bro Cyril's best friend from high school, his sister, passed away after a lifelong struggle with a rare, degenerative illness. I only met her once or twice years ago, but Jason's another brother to me. I was reminded of that Friday, the longest Friday of my life, nearly two years ago...we were all spread out in the huge waiting area, resting, waiting...I think the docs had told us to let Dad rest or he was undergoing another test, I don't really remember. This handsome guy shows up, greets Cyril, sits with Mom, Aunt Denise, and Uncle Tom, casts a "hello" look in my direction. I looked at him and figured he was someone from Cyril's church, Cyril was heavily involved in a Baptist establishment at the time. But the face was familiar and it took about 5 minutes for me to realize that this tall, grown-up guy who looked like he just stepped out of a Polo ad, was Jason. When he was in high school, he was a runner, so even though he grew tall, he never weighed more than a buck and a half. Now in his 30s and the father of twins, he'd become a man. The wheel of life turned another notch.

I ache for him now. If I went to the funeral, it would be to support him. I'll send sympathy cards, and I lit a candle last night for her. I never knew Tiffany, his sister, but Jason drove up that Friday from Clearwater (3 hours away...well, 2½ if he still drives as I remember), stayed through the hardest decision we've all ever made, went home, and came back for the funeral at the end of the week. He was a solid support for us in the most trying time of our lives. I pray for his strength now. Tiffany lived long past her life expectancy, and there were many roadblocks, times when they thought they would lose her; but she had this indomitable spirit and she was honored by the community for her positive outlook. Cyril would talk about how even when she was sick and wheelchair-bound, her face would light up with recognition when he walked into the room. I'm going through this tough questioning period right now, regarding my having any faith to speak of, but for people like Tiffany, I have to believe there's a Summerland.