Of course I don't mean that literally...it's just I'm realizing that my impatience at my lack of inner peace is causing me to make rash decisions about faith. Going to a Christian church when you're really a Unitarian is an exercise in self-flagellation. Add to that the fact that it's in SC, a state so steeped in the Bible belt that they're basically moving backwards socially, and you've got a recipe for anything but inner peace.
So I found a city park with hiking trails that's a whole 8 minutes from the house. That's where I'll be Sunday morning while the others are sleeping in. I'll pack my raincoat, procure some bug spray, and go traipsing through the woods.
I'm really looking forward to getting out of town. We haven't been north since March, when we went on our last scouting trip for the move. We rambled around Columbia, bursting with the hope that accompanies that type of life change - a move to another city. Circumstances may have changed, but SC still holds a special place in my heart, and we're still planning to eventually move there. The air tastes better, lighter; his folks' house is surrounded by pine trees that are great for hugging and shade; and we'll get to see his family, hopefully diffuse a bit of the tension that they live with constantly. The household consists of Mom & Dad J, Grandma, Les's sis Kara, her significant other Allan, and their daughter Kylie. It's become a pretty tight fit; there's a lot of strong personalities under that roof. Kara and Allan are in their 30s, but lack the motivation to move out on their own; and Grandma, while someone I respect for her elder status, is a sharp-tongued pill at times. It'll be good to have us there to distract them for a bit, and I'm looking forward to playing with Kylie, who turned 1 this past week. Also looking forward to seeing Dad J, though I know I'm going to break down when I hug him, because it'll remind me so strongly of what I've lost.
Knitting this weekend will be all baby stuff...I'm finishing Kylie's top, and then I'll start a sweater for Cooper and some booties, maybe a hat and some washcloths for Elise.
1 comment:
spending time in the woods always seems to heal me. I think that is a good decision. Mel, consider coming over to the house- I will be glad to give you some reike treatments. It will help. Atleast-- I know it helps Tom and Steph has recently agreed to let me work with her as well. Its not purely selfless that I offer so please don't feel it is an imposition. It is important to me that I do something in the life other than consume.
Anyway, I read your blog often and you are in my thoughts often.
Take care,
Love and light, Izzy
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