Random thoughts and better feelings

Y'ever have a relative (or actually, for the case we're describing, it's usually an ex-relative) who makes you so nuts with their transparent attempts at emotional blackmail, that you'd just like to go over to their house, rip the front door off with your bare hands, and give them a stern talking-to?

But you know you can't do that, and so you stew and think about writing them an eloquent email that would tell them in no uncertain terms that if they don't grow the hell up and knock that shit off, that there's a definite chance that the first option will occur.

But you know that that's passive-aggressive, and so you plan fresh protection spells around your loved ones instead and feel like you're doing nothing.

That's all the time I'm going to waste thinking about my cunt ex-sister-in-law. What else is new?

I'm back on my meds. I'm a happy camper. I guess when your body's used to X med, it's easier for your brain to come around when you go back on it. You know how TPTB say that antidepressants can take up to 4 or 6 weeks to do some good? Well, it's been 5 days for me, and the difference is marked. I'm not 100%, but my energy level has returned, I can accomplish normal everyday things again, and I don't feel like gum on the bottom of a sneaker. And even better, I'm finally reconciling myself to the fact that I could be on this med or something like it for the rest of my life. Well, it's only been 8 or 9 years; about time I gave that concept some thought.

It's Halloween, or Samhain, depending on your philosophy. The distractions of the past month kept me from pulling off any sort of costume for work, so I'm wearing black to honor my ancestors. Samhain is a time to honor the past and look to the future; it's a witches' new year. I burn the old resolutions and write new ones, and meditate hard on how the last year went and what I want to accomplish in the new one. It's a pretty tall order this time, and I can't decide when to do it. When I remember to celebrate the sabbats, I usually do them astrologically, meaning when the sun hits the next sign on or around the known day of the holiday. In Samhain's case this year, it's on Tuesday, November 7 (sun reaches 15 degrees Scorpio), but the full moon is Sunday and I don't think I want to do this ritual on a waning moon, so I'll probably do something this weekend instead. The sad thing is one of the reasons I'm not just doing it tonight, on Halloween, is because I've got 3 solid hours of decent TV on tonight. Religious dedication requires some wiggle room in the distractions of the present.

Ripped out all of Beach this past weekend to start an afghan instead and get rid of the blasted Wool-Ease once and for all, but I can already tell it's going to need modification. I tried to do a seed stitch border with leftover Jiffy, but I'm using size 13s and it's just too damn stretchy. Stupid thing is I just remembered that I have a skein of Wool Ease in the same color beige as the Jiffy border, so I think I'll rip it all out when I get home and start fresh using double-strand Wool Ease throughout on like, size 10s. Actually, may not use the beige at all; the body is one strand dark blue, one strand dark pink, and it's coming out darker than I'd originally planned - would look better with just a blue or just a pink border.

Otherwise, have small projects in the works (hat, scarf, mitts), but I oughta finish them soon, because the crazy part of me has one (only ONE!) project planned for a family member for Christmas, and that'll take some time and effort.

Did I mention I'm feeling better? :)