Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Just popping in

Nothing exciting to post, actually. One of those times when you want to push down the previous post, because it's too sad to think about. Kendra's memorial is this Saturday, and I wish I could go, even though it promises to be more of a zoo than a memorial. She garnered such support and publicity during her struggle. But it's moot. Weaverville, NC, to Pace, FL, is way too far to drive in a car that needs 2 tires, new brakes, and a serious tune-up, even if we had the dough (and patience) for another long car trip, which we don't. But her story had me praying again, and that's something I struggled with for years since going non-Christian. When you grow up talking to Jesus, and now Jesus isn't the big guy in your spiritual life anymore, who the heck are you talking to now when you pray?

I went to church this past Sunday, a UU congregation a half hour's drive from here. I bypassed the Asheville UU to get to them. I went to Asheville's UU once last year, and the vibe in the place just didn't appeal to me, no clue why. I have high standards with UU churches, because Rev. Dr. John Young (ret.) at the Jacksonville UU was excellent, very friendly and immensely learned. But the Swannanoa Valley UU felt better. The reverend seemed smart and jovial. I was in my shell the whole time I was there. That's the one hard part about hitting a new church - everyone's so dang friendly, and it takes me at least one service to thaw out. But I liked what I saw, and I'll be going back, weather-permitting, this Sunday.

In a case of painfully coincidental timing, the service I attended last Sunday was that congregation's chance to honor the members who passed on in 2012 and 2013. Reading out names, dedicating a song, ringing the meditation bell. I thought of Kendra and got teary, but I also felt a peace, similar to the comfort I experienced at the Catholic funeral last week. Hey, I'll take it.

Just wrote a pile of paragraphs on the frustration surrounding my MIL's attitude and living situation, and then thought better of it and stuck it on my private blog. So I'll just ask for prayers of compassion, that I may relate to her situation better and help her find her way eventually.

This week is about making new habits. I've half-assed started Whole 30, meaning I'm burning through the almond milk in the fridge first and THEN I'll really start, and there have been slip-ups here and there in just the 2 days that I've tried to be more conscious of my food intake. But my inflammation is down again already, noticed it when I woke up this morning, and that's motivating as hell. Eating clean, whole foods as often as possible, and getting back on a walking regimen are the main goals this week.

Image from here.

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