Thursday, September 29, 2011

Autumn ache

Great Smoky Mountains National Park. Current temp. 61F.

It's a full-of-promise Thursday here folks, as I go over in my head how I've backslid this week, what areas of my life need improvement, and how else I can spruce up the apartment before Husby gets home Monday.

One very cool thing is that my body definitely tells me now when I'm backsliding. I've been totally dragged out this week because of the taboo items I've let slip back into my diet, and small aches and pains are telling me I HAVE to get my lazy arse back to the Y and in front of the tube doing yoga. A twingy elbow today makes me wonder if my arthritis is spreading to parts north of my knees, and I have at least 2 bone spur areas in my right foot. I'm far too young to sound like this.

As we slip into autumn in points north, the air hasn't changed much here, just a very subtle lightening. It dawned on me the other day that if we let this new lease run its full course, it will mean missing not 1, but 2 more autumns before leaving Florida. As I ache for changing leaves and cooler temps., I'm pretty sure that this realization is unacceptable. Discovered that the John Campbell Folk School holds a fall festival that I'd love to attend. Also, blog writers whom I adore and view as mentors are offering workshops I can't attend, workshops that wouldn't even be prudent yet anyway because we're so far away still from having a house, animals, garden, etc. My time will come, I know, but still, it's unacceptable.

It's been nearly impossible to visualize budgeting and projecting however, when we've been living SO paycheck to paycheck, that it's not even that...we've been borrowing here and there again to cover the bills. However I also think I've been using that as an excuse not to act, and I'm recognizing that not even trying to plan isn't going to get us there either.

Luckily, the gift of OT is presenting itself again, and I pray that with hard work and a little focus, we can get back to where we're maintaining our own lives and saving a pinch at a time toward the life we want.

Image from here.

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