Getting in the spirit

Chilly here now...30s at night, 50s during day. Windows open full time :)

I set out today on this shortest day of the year wearing my green hat, purple curly scarf...got complemented on the hat and was proud to say I'd knitted it myself. Keeping my hair down to warm the ole ears...

Freezer full of pound cake, cookie dough in the fridge. Body was wiped out by evening, but I'm rallying today for round 2. Tonight, cookies, wrapping pressies, looking ahead. To a holiday season that doesn't require extended travel. To the 2 days off I have once we get home. Yeah, OK, I'm grousing...I know I'll enjoy seeing everyone, and lord knows I'll enjoy being up there (my grass, my trees, the niece...). But it's also motivating...would love a holiday where we spend a day instead of several, where I don't have to worry about the cat being alone...we clean her litter before we go, place clean water and treats in several places, and she feeds from a silo, but still...

This season is teaching me frugality, patience, and quite a bit about how I want to celebrate the holidays, whether we have children or not. I want the tree up next year. I want to observe pagan Advent, Yule, and Christmas. I want to make more gifts...the sewing machine never even made it out this year. Not beating myself up over that, but as I see what we've purchased vs. what I've made in the gift department, it's a strong motivator. Trolling the evil big box store on Saturday for last-minute gifts rang false and hasty...was entirely necessary this year, with the way we've been living paycheck to paycheck though, so feeling bad about it is useless. I also may start shopping for staples there...can't stand the thought of contributing to that place, but the fact is the money we save there could go toward the move in some way, so I'm willing to sacrifice my pride and principles for a pinch.

So I sit here, pondering Yule, with my Santa pin on my shirt and my wreath earrings in, and I think about the sun god, the nativity story, and the hope of enjoying the wonder of the season with our own children someday...